Grace in a "Mom's" Embrace

A boy I mentor in Homewood has had a severely strained relationship with his biological mother for a long time. His mom battles addiction and homelessness, and she has been unable to take care of him. Their relationship was abusive when he lived with her, so he is no longer able to live with her. As long as I've known him (four years) he's bounced around from house to house, staying with whoever will take him in for the night. Now a freshman in high school, from what I have been able to see he is pretty much raising himself.

I had the opportunity to meet his mom one time, which was early on in our mentoring relationship. I needed to have some paperwork signed by a guardian so that he could be in the mentoring program, so my young friend showed me where his mother happened to be staying at that time. There was no way to reach her by phone, so we would have to go directly to her house to try to catch her. On that day, let's just say I caught her at a bad time. I did manage to get her to sign the paper, but that visit to her house came at a cost to my mentee. Although I've probably seen this mentee every week for the past four years, I have not seen his mom since that day. In fact, over the last year or so he has even stopped talking about her. I know he is deeply hurt and wounded from not having a relationship with his mom, but he distances himself from her out of self-preservation.

So I was surprised a few days ago when, after hanging out together, he asked me to drop him off at a new house... his "mom's house." I was shocked! He had not mentioned anything to me about being reconciled with his mother. I was nervous about dropping him off there at this new house with her. He got out of my car, and I always wait to make sure the kids get into their homes alright. As he slowly walked to the front door, he noticed a kid who I know is his best friend walking down the sidewalk toward him. He stopped on the steps to this house, greeted his friend, and then they both went to the door together. The door opened, and a woman who I did not recognize greeted them with a warm smile. She hugged and kissed my mentee's friend. Then she opened her arms wide for my mentee, she embraced him for a while, and I overheard her say, "Welcome home, baby! How was your day?" Needless to say, I was confused. When my mentee slipped out of her embrace, he turned around and saw me still sitting there in my car with my window down... staring at them with a dumbfounded look on my face. He said, "Mr. B... come here. You gotta meet my mom." Of course I got out of my car to meet her and figure out what was going on. She invited me to come in, so while my mentee and his best friend went into the kitchen to get something to eat, she explained to me that she was not his real mom. She was his best friend's mom, and she had taken my mentee in to live with them for a while. She had become a "mom" to him. I had the most incredible conversation with her. She doesn't have much, and she struggles to meet the needs of her own son, but by her measure... "Everyone should have a mom."

There is power in a mother's embrace, even if that embrace doesn't technically come from a "real mom." In church we talk about grace. A few days ago, on the front porch of a broken down row house in Homewood, I got to see grace lived out in a woman giving out a "mom hug" to a boy who desperately needed it. God let me see that hug, and I got a snapshot of the Kingdom of God in that moment. The Holy Spirit works in vulnerable place with hurting people, and grace isn't just found in church buildings on Sunday mornings.