Sunday, April 17, 2011

A Crisis of Masculinity

Most of the young men that I mentor struggle with the issue of sexuality. There are many opportunities for them to become sexually active at a young age, and they live in a hyper-sexualized culture. My peers, in their twenties and thirties, struggle with the same issue. Many young adult men in America decide not to get married, instead settling for sexual gratification through one night stands, the hook up culture, or choosing to live with a person instead of getting married. Often, men in their forties and fifties endure that stage of life with pornography addictions, or even infidelity happens, for a wide variety of reasons. Some guys think it's no big deal to hang out with their buddies at the strip club. This crisis of sexual struggles with men in America is indicative of a broader crisis of masculinity.

God designed us, as men, to live out of our strength. We are supposed to give our strength away to others. Wives need husbands who love them well by caring for their hearts and following Christ with all of their strength. Children need to have fathers who are deeply committed to them and their mothers. If a man comes into influence at work, his employees need his strength to help them with their jobs and with good wages so that their families can be supported. Our towns and neighborhoods need men to live out of their strength so that the community is held together more closely. This country, and even this world, needs men who are willing to take risks and follow Christ well so that the world will be a better place.

So, the problem with sexual struggles is that men choose not to live out of their strength. Giving into sexual temptation means taking the "easy" way out. We fail to offer ourselves to others, and instead we become takers. We become users. Plus, not only does sexual sin hurt others, it hurts our selves. Every time we give in to lust and temptation, we hurt ourselves. We struggle, our families break down, and society at large starts to fall apart because men are taken out by sexual temptations. There is hope, though. It's never too late for God to restore our relationships and make them whole. It's never too late for God to heal our hearts and help us live out of the freedom that comes with being released from sexual sin and addictions. Young men who have become sexually active outside of marriage can stop that lifestyle at any time and commit themselves to sexual integrity. The man who is living with his girlfriend can choose at any time to live out of his strength and commit to her through marriage. The man who is in the prime of his life can choose not to have a mid-life crisis, and instead give himself away fully in a committed relationship with his wife. This is not just a matter of will power. I'm talking about something that God does for us when we are in a true, authentic relationship with him. God will heal us, and equip us to move forward. The crisis of masculinity in America will not be overcome by will power. It will be overcome because this generation of men allowed God to work through them on a daily basis to live out of the strength that this world truly needs.

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