It's been almost two years since I officially became a pastor. The past couple of years have been an incredible learning curve for me. I love many parts of being a pastor, and I struggle with the many nuances of becoming an effective pastor. It is definitely challenging to be a pastor in our society. I have good days and I have bad days. On the good days, I'm leading people closer to God and to one another. On the bad days, I try to control my circumstances and my pride gets in the way of me serving as an effective leader. Some days I feel full of energy and optimism, while other days I feel tired and I'm pessimistic about things. I love serving as a pastor. I love the people in my part of the city and I love the church. If I'm honest with myself and with others, though, I still have a long way to go when it comes to adjusting my life to the role of "pastor."
To that end, I've been reading Eugene Peterson's book "The Pastor." The book serves as his memoir from his 50+ years of serving as a pastor. His perspectives on being a pastor are at times refreshing and at times extremely challenging. Peterson is a good writer, and I am thankful that he chose to share his wisdom in this book so that young pastors like me can glean from his insight. I'm still working my way through the book, but here are a few quotes from the introduction section that I'm wrestling with at the moment:
Peterson suggests that it is extremely challenging to serve as a pastor in North America: "Men and women who are pastors in America today find that they have entered into a way of life that is in ruins. The vocation of pastor has been replaced by the strategies of religious entrepreneurs with business plans."
With regard to the high rate of pastors in America leaving the profession or burning out, Peterson writes: I wonder if at the root of the defection is a cultural assumption that all leaders are people who "get things done," and "make things happen." That is certainly true of the primary leadership models that seep into our awareness from the culture - politicians, businessmen, advertisers, publicists, celebrities, and athletes. But while being a pastor certainly has some of these components, the pervasive element in our two-thousand-year pastoral tradition is not someone who "gets things done" but rather the person is placed in the community to pay attention and call attention to "what is going on right now" between men and women, with one another and with God - this kingdom of God that is primarily local, relentlessly personal, and prayerful "without ceasing."
Describing what it's like to become a pastor, Peterson writes: "There is no blueprint on file for becoming a pastor. In becoming one, I have found that it is a most context-specific way of life: the pastor's emotional life, family life, experience in the faith, and aptitudes out in an actual congregation in the neighborhood in which she or he lives - these people just as they are, in this place. No copying. No trying to be successful. The ways in which the vocation of pastor is conceived, develops, and comes to birth is unique to each pastor."
That last quote describes what it has been like for me in becoming a pastor to a local congregation in the East End of the city of Pittsburgh. I love our people. I have had the privilege of serving as a pastor with an extremely diverse group of people in a complex urban environment. In becoming a pastor, God has asked me to serve homeless people, entrepreneurs, college students, doctors, drug dealers, lawyers, drug addicts, stay-at-home moms, bankers, prostitutes, business executives, contractors, big families, single parents, at-risk children, nonprofit leaders, musicians, teachers, young adults, half timers, retirees, and people from many different socioeconomic and ethnic backgrounds.
Such a diverse group of people requires a diverse pastoral skill set in my unique urban environment. I do appreciate the opportunity to serve as a pastor, and I am learning that it is impossible to take on challenges by myself. God has given me everything I need to thrive in my calling because I am not the focus of my work as a pastor. God is. I am just a witness to the work of the Holy Spirit in my context. As Eugene Peterson puts it: "A witness is never the center but only the person who points to or names what is going on at the center - in this case, the action and revelation of God in all the operations of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit."
My prayer is that as I continue to learn to be a pastor, God will continue to stay at the center of my calling. I want to be a pastor who follows Jesus passionately, and leads others to follow Jesus passionately. I am thankful for the grace that so many people have given to me over the past couple of years as I find my way. I'm looking forward to what God has in store for me as a pastor in the future.
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