Raising Children to be Involved in Orphan Care

Every year I look forward to the opportunity to lead a breakout session at the North Way Orphan Care Expo. The big event is coming up this Saturday, November 9th. I usually teach on a different topic each year, and this year I'll be talking about raising children to be involved in orphan care.

We live in a culture that encourages us to provide the best things for our children, and to go to great lengths in order to be able to distance them from the brokenness that exists in this world. We seek the best schools, neighborhoods, and other opportunities for our kids. If we distance our children too much from the difficult realities of this world, though, including the national and international orphan crisis that exists, then how will our children grow up to be passionate about impacting the difficult people and places of this world with the profound, transformational love of Jesus Christ?

Just like any other part of life, our children need to be equipped by their parents in order to be prepared for adulthood. In this breakout session we'll be exploring how to empower and equip our children now, at a young age, to make a difference with their lives with regard to caring for orphans. We'll discuss how to catch our children up in God's adventure to redeem the world. We'll see what the Bible has to say about raising children to be spiritual champions, and we'll explore practical examples of how families can care for orphans together.

If you're reading this blog post, I hope you'll plan to attend the Orphan Care Expo and participate in the breakout session. Even if you don't come to my breakout session, the entire event is going to be amazing. God is doing an incredible work through this annual event, and I'm excited to see what comes out of this year's event. I hope to see you on Saturday!

Diversity in the City

My daughters had a bunch of friends from their school over for a party this afternoon. As I looked around the house, I noticed how diverse their friends are. Their friends are African-American, Asian-American, Caucasian, and Hispanic, and they come from different levels of socioeconomic status. All of the kids are growing up in an urban environment.

I am being very intentional by raising my daughters in the midst of a big city. The world that my daughters will be navigating when they become adults will be increasingly urban, so I am preparing them by raising them to understand cities. By the time my daughters are adults, there will be more minorities living in America than white people. I am raising them in a city that has many different kinds of people so that they will be able to thrive as adults at building relationships with people who are different than them racially and socioeconomically.

Cities do present challenges when it comes to raising a family. However, the rewards definitely outweigh the risks. It is important to prepare children to be able to thrive in the world as adults, and the city makes for a wonderful classroom. I am thankful for the diversity that the city incorporates into my family's life.

An Afternoon of Strange Animal Encounters

Raising kids is always an interesting thing.  Yesterday afternoon when I arrived home from work I walked right into something unexpected. One of the kids in my neighborhood had stumbled upon a stray cat who had kittens in an abandoned house on my street. He had somehow managed to get a hold of one of the kittens, he brought it over to our house to show us, and then he used his business instincts to track down one of his friends and sell him the cat for $17 (I'm not sure how he knew the going rate for stray kittens these days, but that's another story). He came back to my house after the sale, shared what had happened with my daughters, and he promptly invited them to join in on his new business venture. Apparently, the offer made was that he would catch the rest of the stray kittens, bring them over to our house, my daughters would give the kittens a bath so that they smelled good going into the business transaction, their friend would then go out into the community and sell the kittens to other kids in Homewood, and then he would come back to our house and share a certain percentage of the profits with my daughters (I'm not sure if they took into consideration the overhead costs of water, soap, and towels involved in bathing kittens, but that's another matter). They had the whole plan worked out, and just as I was figuring out how I should respond to this situation, my wife informed me that our dog, a boxer named Bella, was having a false pregnancy. She had confused several of her squeaky toys for "puppies," and she was carrying them gently around the house while "mothering" them. The thought briefly crossed my mind, wondering if my daughters and their friend from the neighborhood might also be able to sell my fake squeaky toy "grandpuppies" in the underground pet market in Homewood, but I thought that might not be such a good idea. After a tough conversation with my daughters about how they are not allowed to profit from the aiding and then selling of helpless stray animals in our neighborhood, and after trying to explain to my daughters that our dog thinks she has puppies when she actually doesn't, I was ready to chalk up my afternoon as one of the most bizarre afternoons I've ever had. Oh, and I got to drop over $200 at the vet to find out that my dog really was not pregnant but only a mother in her head. I can only imagine how much it costs to take a dog to a pet psychologist! As if I needed more female hormonal issues around my house anyway! I wonder what unexpected adventures await me when I arrive home today?

God's Cosmic Safari Rain Forest Adventure

I've been noticing something odd recently. Churches all over the place are advertising for the various VBS experiences that they are offering for the young people in their communities. That in itself is not odd, but the adventurous names given to the VBS themes are what keep catching my attention. Names like "Safari with God" or "Rain Forest Adventure" or "Galactic Explorers" are marketed by taping handmade signs to the church's roadside display (the same displays that list the pastor's name, service times, and denomination, telling everyone exactly when and how they can access God once a week on Sunday mornings). Some lucky churches may receive thier national denomination's chosen VBS materials in advance, so that they even have some marketing signs to display for all who drive past (as if to say, "The party is in here for this one week this summer!").

This type of thing sends a message that the really adventurous life with God can only be found on adventures with wild animals in Africa or in the rain forest or even in outer space. This plays right into what I call escapist theology. Most Christians in America today live like their own towns and cities are evil, that this whole world is evil, and our only escape is to either become missionaries to the rain forest or hope that we are going to somehow vanish and land magically in heaven to escape everything (the rapture, and escapist theology in general, is not biblical by the way). What's my point? God created everything, and it is GOOD! Even though we live in a present evil age, God does not say that his creation is evil. Christians need to engage culture, especially our own towns and cities every single day throughout the year. God is in cities! Some people think God can only be found in nature by sitting next to waterfalls or frollicking in mountain meadows. Yes, God is found in those places, but he is also to be found in cities and in the midst of broken systems and broken relationships. People are hurting right next door and right down the street from us, not just in the rain forest and on safaris. We should be teaching our children that!

We need to stop teaching our children that life is adventurous with God only one week during the summer of every year. We need to stop teaching our children that the real adenturous life with God only happens in the rain forest. Life is adventurous with God all of the time! Our children should be doing hard things, learning how to engage brokenness in the world, and learning how God is moving every day throughout our own lives and our own culture. Instead, most Christian parents are very actively overprotecting thier children and "providing" for them as stagnant and neutral environments as they can possibly force upon them. We simply must create that all important Christian bubble, which will serve to protect our children from this evil world. Then, we'll let them out of the bubble for one week each year so that they can learn about how an adventure with God is found in outer space. But then it's right back into the bubble after that. Right?

Parents... please, please, please teach your children by both telling and modeling for them that life with God is an adventure all of the time, in our own contexts, in our own communities and schools and workplaces. God is not only to be found and experienced in a church building on Sunday mornings, or for one week each summer. The reason most kids walk away from their Christian faith when they enter college is because their parents helped them develop a very wierd escapist theology which they in turn are unable to contextualize to their new environment on their own. Teach your children how to engage culture, not escape from it. We don't really need to send our kids as missionaries to Africa or the rain forest anymore. Eighty percent of the world's Christians now live outside the West in places like that. That missionary strategy worked! But now, it is not needed anymore. Christianity is rapidly declining in America. Africa is now sending missionaries to us in America! You need to teach your children how to be on fire for God and live the adventurous journey with Christ right here where we are living right now!

Raising Kids to be Giants

My dad and I attended an event last week where Dr. John Perkins spoke. He is a nationally renowned leader in Christian community development and racial reconciliation. We both had the chance to meet him, and he was very engaging with both of us. Following the first section of the conference in which he delivered a passionate call for all Christians to engage in racial reconciliation and social justice, my dad said the following to him as the three of us spoke: "I hear what you are saying, but I wonder if my son here has taken your message too far? He moved my grandchildren into one of the most violent neighborhoods in Pittsburgh, where they are surrounded by gangs, drugs, prostitution, and boarded up homes. My granddaughter is the only white child in a school with over 500 black children. Their neighborhood is not safe. What impact do you think all of this is having on my grandchildren?"

As dad described the blight of the situation (and I love my dad's heart by the way... he has been very supportive of us), Dr. Perkins cracked a smile that kept getting bigger and bigger as the circumstances were described more and more dramatically. To answer the question, he put his arm around me, looked my dad square in the eyes, and said, "Listen to me, now. I know you think what your son is doing probably doesn't make any sense, and I don't blame you for being concerned. But... your son is giving your granddaughters an incredible gift. Mark my words... they are going to grow up to be spiritual giants! They will make a huge impact for Christ in this world because of their life experiences growing up!"

Of course I was so blessed by his answer, but my dad was really pleased, too. We live in a society which leads many kids astray, and many parents think they are helping their children by raising them in the safest circumstances that they can possibly find... the best schools, the safest neighborhoods, etc. Dr. Perkins' perspective, which I strongly believe in, is that we should not shelter our children from the brokenness in our world. Julie and I are modeling for our children how God calls us as Christians to engage culture, serve people who are hurting, and lead people to Christ's restoring and transformational love. Ministry does not happen in sterile conditions, and kids will not learn how to be transformational agents for Christ by living comfortably and at a safe distance from brokenness in our society.